Salty Dick The Red Flag song lyrics

While walking across the rocks so bare I saw a maiden lying there.

And as she lay in sweet repose a breath of wind blew up her clothes.

A sailor who was passing by lifted his hat and winked his eye,

And then he saw, to his despair, she had the red flag flying there.

The sailor would not be denied, he said, "By God, I'll slip inside."

He stripped down to his underwear, and soon his ass was shining bare.

The maiden she was not perturbed, not in the slightest bit disturbed,

For come what may, full well she knew the brave red flag would see her through.

The sailor he was shivering, his mighty prick was quivering,

But soon he knew he'd met his match, he could not penetrate her snatch.

Try as he might his path was blocked all he could do was fire half-cocked.

To quit the fray he did prepare and leave the fucking red flag there.

The moral of this tale is plain but pardon me if I explain:

In love or war - it matters not, you never, never waste a shot.

The sailor's judgment was at fault to penetrate the maiden's vault

With red flag flying, let it pass - just shove it up the maiden's ass.